Number two: This question is a little tricky.
If you hate me so much, why don’t you leave me? Why don’t you let me go now?
A narcissist can also ask you this question. I’ll talk about that in a minute.
When you ask this question to a narcissist, you will never get a genuine answer—because a narcissist will not tell you, “Yes, I have a love-hate situation going on with you. I hate you. I hate your guts. But I cannot leave you.”
Not because they really care for you. Not because they’ll miss you. Not because they deeply, deeply want you to be in their life.
No—I can’t let you go because I can’t live without you. I depend more on you than on how much you depend on me.
That is the real answer.
This question can never ever be answered by a narcissist because that would require them to be vulnerable. It would require them to confess their crimes and tell you who they are.
If a narcissist happens to ask you this question, their intention is completely different. They’re asking you this question to guilt-trip you—to make you feel bad and sad. They want you to feel like you are causing them a lot of harm, like you’re a miserable, pathetic human being—and that the fault is yours.
They want you to understand that you have free will to make a choice and decide, but you’re not deciding to leave. That means it’s your mistake.
Whatever is happening is okay because they haven’t closed the doors for you. It doesn’t make any sense, but it’s about avoiding responsibility. It’s about pushing it away. It’s about not acknowledging that they have traumatized you to your core—your trauma, inside out, left right and center.
You cannot leave them that easily.
But when a narcissist asks you a question like that, know that it’s nothing but invalidation of your pain.
3. Do you genuinely believe your opinions are facts, and they supersede others?
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