There’s a moment in life when you look at someone you care about, and something deep inside you whispers, “This is hurting me.” And now, you feel your veins fill with fire. It doesn’t happen loudly; it doesn’t happen suddenly. It happens slowly, quietly, like a crack spreading through glass. A comment here, a criticism there, a shift in their tone, a strange feeling you can’t quite explain. You start sleeping less. You start doubting yourself more. Your chest gets tighter, your thoughts get louder, and your peace becomes something you can’t seem to reach anymore. You ask yourself a question that hurts more than the truth itself: Why do I feel worse every time I’m near this person?
When the person you’re dealing with is a narcissist, the damage is never obvious at first. It’s subtle, silent, disguised as love, as connection, as “maybe it’s my fault.” According to Joe Navarro, a man who spent 25 years in the FBI catching spies and decoding human behavior through body language, expressions, and psychological tells, the truth is blunt, painful, and impossible to sugarcoat. If someone is dealing with a narcissist, what must they do? These individuals are so toxic that eventually, they will victimize you physically, mentally, emotionally, psychologically, or financially. The question then is, how long are you willing to tolerate it?
Because you will pay a price. Not maybe, not possibly, not in extreme situations. You will pay a price. Your body will pay it. Your mind will pay it. Your spirit will pay it. Navarro continues, “You know, there’s a great book called The Body Keeps the Score. The body will definitely keep the score. And if you stay too long, your nervous system starts absorbing their chaos until your own emotions no longer feel like your own.” Narcissists don’t just hurt you; they reshape you.
At first, you try to understand them. You tell yourself they’re stressed, that they don’t mean it; that maybe you’re too sensitive; that things will get better if you’re more patient, more loving, more forgiving. But this isn’t love. This is erosion. A narcissist slowly pulls you apart in ways you don’t even see happening: anxiety, confusion, guilt, shame, self-doubt, emotional exhaustion. This is the invisible price Navarro speaks about. And eventually, he says, you stop being in a relationship and start being someone’s emotional chew toy. If you become that person’s chew toy, you will suffer immensely.
5 Short-Term Wins Narcissists Chase That Lead to a Miserable Old Age
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