Number one: the sound of children playing happily. Let’s start with the most innocent sound in the world—the sound of children giggling, running, and playing. To a healthy person, this is the sound of life. It makes you feel warm. It makes you feel grateful. But have you ever noticed what happens to the narcissist when the kids are having too much fun? They get irritated. They become tense. They may snap, saying, “Keep it down. I have a headache,” or “Why is there so much chaos in the house?” I’ve seen this happen with my narcissistic grandfather, my father, and my mother. They’ll sit in a chair stewing in anger, feeling disrespected because the children are playing near them. Here’s what’s happening in their mind: the children are happy, but they’re not paying attention to the narcissist. The narcissist views the family as an audience. If the audience is looking at each other, laughing and having fun, then they’re not looking at the star. The narcissist feels ignored.
But it goes deeper. Children are authentic. They do not wear masks. They scream when they’re happy and cry when they’re sad, right? They are pure spirit. A narcissist, however, is pure performance. They wear a heavy mask 24/7. When they see that raw, effortless joy in a child, it irritates their soul. It reminds them that they have lost the ability to just be. They cannot just play; they have to perform. So, they try to shut it down. They try to control the volume. They try to stop the joy because that joy is not about them. They want the children to be “soldiers,” not happy kids.
Affection for Pets: A Source of Narcissistic Jealousy
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