Before a woman leaves a narcissist, God—call it the universe or whatever—disturbs her comfort. This may sound counterintuitive, but it will make sense. He removes the soft blindfold she has been wearing and allows the toxic mask to slip. For a long time, she likely survived by making excuses for him because she had to. When he was mean, she told herself he was just stressed at work. When he ignored her, she thought he just needed some space. She lived on the hope that if she tried a little harder, he would finally treat her as if she mattered.
But suddenly, a strange shift happens. God steps in and makes what she used to tolerate suddenly feel completely unbearable. What once felt like a potential change begins to feel like quiet suffocation. Think of listening to your favorite radio station while driving; for years, the music was clear, but suddenly the signal starts breaking up. The beautiful song turns into harsh, irritating static. She cannot listen to it anymore without getting a headache. This stage feels exactly like that.
The excuses stop soothing her heart, and the fake apologies he offers cease to convince her mind. She begins to see the ugly cycle for what it is and notices all the toxic patterns she had forced herself to ignore before. She sees the constant disrespect and feels a deep emotional starvation from giving all her love to a man who gives her absolutely nothing in return. This heavy feeling is not chaos; she is not going crazy. This is an awakening in itself. God does not begin her rescue with a quick escape plan; He starts with sharp, undeniable clarity. He makes her feel deeply uncomfortable in her situation so that she finally wants to fly away.
Stage Number Two: The Internal War
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